Warren Ellis has posted some crazy cracked out sc-fi porno-lit--see: "Rupture"--resurrected from when he was on some kind of sperm-on-the-brain, 24-hour, fugue state-fueled tear in 2005.
His honorable goal: "A searing rupture in the sf paradigm: the certain knowledge that in fact what sf needed was both an upgrade and a retrograde. A science fiction dominated by obsession with penis size, an adolescent terror of sex, sickening violence and massive, random, senseless explosions. Written with the sort of ugly, naive bluntness with which a disturbed teenager might craft the self-produced pornographic material that just barely prevents him from going off the rails and fucking all the neighbourhood pets to death."
He calls it "pure." I call it porntastic. My favorite line: "I grabbed a handful of my own semen out of Mother Teresa and flung it at the oncoming cops. They all got instantly pregnant and fell over. Even the men."
Warren Ellis has tagged me in one of those wretched memes, this one called Seven Songs.
First, I must post the directive: "List seven songs you are into right now. No matter what the genre, whether they have words, or even if they’re not any good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying now, shaping your spring. Post these instructions in your blog along with your 7 songs. Then tag 7 other people to see what they’re listening to."
Ellis adds: "These things circulate like a dose of the intellectual clap." I guess this means Ellis has given me a dose of virtual gonorrhea. Thank you, Warren.
1. "Alice" by Nick Bertke who made the video, lives in Australia, and is nineteen. I can't listen to it enough, and it was this tune that compelled me to start writing my porn novel, Happy, some 50 pages ago. I listen to it when I write.
2. "Give It 2 Me" by Madonna. Embarrassing, no? Clearly, I have no class. Right now, "A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila" is playing on the TV behind me. I'm trash. At least I know it.
3. "Wish" by Franka Potente and Thomas D. Otherwise known as the song from "Run Lola Run." Sometimes I have issues with getting motivated. This song gets me going. Komm zu mir, indeed.
4. "Love Will Tear Us Apart" as done by Susanna and the Magical Orchestra. Totally good tune for when you want to feel bad. Some people like feel good songs. Some people like feel bad songs. We are Susanna(h)s.
5. "Electric Alice" by Grinderman. Play it at my funeral.
6. "The World's Gone Mad" by Handsome Boy Modeling School and featuring Del the Funky Homosapien, et al. Such a pretty caterwaul starts this ditty. Sounds like a broken heart if a broken heart could speak. Has the world gone bad? Maybe. But listenin' to Mr. Funky Homosapien's spittin' makes you want to make up and fuck.
7. "Breakfast" by Le Le. "Bitch. You breakfast. Bitch, you breakfast. You breakfast. You breakfast. You the cheese on my baguette, the jelly on my bread, the French on my toast. Where the ho's at?" Warren Ellis, you breakfast.
Hey, maybe somebody could turn these into a Muxtape.
Due to my small notoriety, people send me information that they say they believe is useful research material but which in actuality they hope will hurt my brain. They send articles, anecdotes, pictures and clips. Due to having written a couple of things related to the American porn industry, I get sent a whole bunch of stuff related to that, and so build up a vague picture of what's going on. And America has broken sex...
This is how you know you're living in the future: when the pornography bears no earthly resemblance to sex as even the filthiest of us know it. You may as well be renting DVDs of aliens fucking. And America, as Martin Amis once said, is where they road-test the future.
I'm a freelance journalist. I've written for Details, Harper's Bazaar, Newsweek,
Radar, Women's Health, Salon, Slate, The Guardian, The Daily Beast, The LA Weekly, The San Francisco Chronicle, Variety, Inc., Esquire, The Atlantic, and I'm a Forbes contributor. In 2008, TIME named me one of the best bloggers of the year. I've appeared on CNN, NPR, and "Politically Incorrect." [EMAIL]
